The New Phase

She’s home and coming down.

Like a balloon once full and floating, now wrinkled, and sinking back down.

Still sometimes confused but making gains every few days.

The concern now is to find a balance and clarity.

Her challenge is to be able to deal with new, intense grief,

Without plunging down into the dark, tired, depths of depression.

What will the future hold?

The beauty and grace in the situation of mom’s “going crazy and having to be hospitalized,” has been a tremendous opportunity for me to work on healing. At the same time, I keep having to remind myself that we each have our own path in life, with our own lessons to learn, and I can’t learn Mom’s lessons for her. I can see that she is a catalyst for my growth.

Sometimes it takes being observant to see change in myself. When the change comes as non- reactivity, I have to step back and notice the new reaction to a familiar situation. Specifically, I had an unexpected feeling last week, when Mom was released from the mental hospital: a feeling of confidence, and a distinct lack of fear of what was to come. No freaking out about what if’s. What a lovely present to myself! Healing works! And I know it works because of how I am seeing things in life lately… differently.

So, what will the future hold? I don’t know, but I’m ready for it. Bring it on!

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About mariner2mother

I'm a mother of a very spirited 14 year old son, and a former merchant ship's deck officer. To feed my creative side I take photos and make a very occasional batch of soap. I am also Reiki attuned and am a student of Energy Healing, having used several healing modalities to work on myself and my family.
This entry was posted in Holistic Healing, Mental Health, The Voyage and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The New Phase

  1. Yes! that is wonderful! You so deserve that feeling. No fear. Couldn’t we all deserve that too.

    • Thanks, and yes, we all deserve it. One thing I am getting from doing a lot of energy work, is moving toward more peace. If everyone could let go of their fears there would absolutely be world peace. Come on everyone! Get on the bandwagon!!

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