How To Fix Your Personal Shit

Ever since I woke up spiritually, almost 4 years ago, I’ve gotten quite an education. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that things are not always as they appear. Quite literally. Objects that appear solid to the touch, according to quantum physics, are not actually solid. And once you understand that completely, and believe it completely, you can walk through walls (because neither you, nor they are really solid). People have actually done this sort of thing.

Knowing that things aren’t always as they appear, has come with learning about life from a different perspective. I’ll fess up right now that this new perspective involves a bit of trusting things I can’t see with my eyes. But with having experience after experience, I’ve learned to trust my intuition and trust other people’s stories that come out of their own intuitive experiences.

Something I’ve learned that has been a real eye opener, and that has helped me feel better about everyday life, is that our unconscious mind runs the show, and if the current program that is running isn’t working for me, I can essentially edit the program. In New Age speak, I can transmute energy that exists as thoughts and belief patterns. This is what healing is all about.

Since everyone likes lists and definitive steps to follow, here’s a step-by-step guide on fixing your shit.

  1. Pay attention to when you are set off. If you have a scenario that pops up regularly enough that you notice, take note.
  2. Being set off or becoming reactive – reacting without thinking – is the red flag you are looking for. It’s evidence of a belief pattern in action. A program is running. If you have kids or someone at work who annoys you, I guarantee you will experience this. Most people try to quiet the uncomfortable feeling with distraction: eating, drinking booze, shopping, having sex, or doing extreme sports, for example. It’s a band-aid.
  3. Find a way to quiet your conscious monkey mind and access your subconscious mind. I’ve had great success using hypnotherapy with a soul directed hypnotherapist. Other people use other methods, including EFT (emotional freedom technique) – or tapping, as it’s also called. The Emotion Code uses applied kinesiology to muscle test the body, looking for these trapped or hidden beliefs.
  4. Follow the thread of the uncomfortable feeling that keeps popping up, until you find the belief that was created and how it was created. Why was that particular program written? What purpose did it serve?
  5. Re-evaluate the program: is the belief still true? If this is causing discomfort in your adult life, I can assure you the belief is no longer true and merely by realizing that, the energy holding that particular belief pattern in place is instantly dissolved, editing the program.
  6. Experience newfound inner peace when the same old scenario comes up and you feel absolutely no reaction around it. It’s quite a trip!

As with other fix-it strategies, it’s always helpful to have an example to follow, so I’ll relate one from my life.

A few weeks ago, I had a hypnotherapy session to look at why, from time to time, I get overwhelmed by life. I’ll start thinking about everything I need to do, and my mind will spiral out of control until I am completely overwhelmed, and I become stuck in the mud. At that point, I can do nothing but sit and watch TV or read. Sometimes I can throw in a load of laundry, but often times, not even that. It can be quite paralyzing.

What happens in a hypnotherapy session is, I’m first brought through an induction phase, where I listen to my hypnotherapist tell me to picture this and imagine that, and I become very physically relaxed. My monkey mind chatterbox brain slowly gets more and more quiet. After a while, I am focused on her voice. Even if there are other sounds around, like a truck going by, it doesn’t affect the process.

My hypnotherapist is what she calls soul-directed, so it’s a spiritually based process when I work with her. This means that she has me tap into the universal energy of all that is. I tap into my higher, God self (as we are all from and of the energy of God). She begins by having intelligent and healing white light shine down on and through me. And after a while, asks for a guide to step forth from the light to help me with my journey.

I’ve had different guides come to help me, and this time it was Mother God, or the feminine energy of our creator. We are made up of both masculine and feminine energies, and when people think of God, they are most often referring to the masculine energy of our source creator.

Now that Mother God had come forth, we set off on our journey. I was directed to think back to a recent time when I felt stuck in the mud. I looked at the feelings and then I was directed to float back in time to when I first felt this way.

When we looked back in time I could see my mother going off on me, yelling, when I was probably 3-ish. The feelings from me were mostly along the lines of terror. In past sessions, I would feel the terror in my body, and experience it in the here and now. But this time it was different. I was aware of the feelings in the 3-year-old me, but didn’t feel them. And at the same time I could see a hazy thread going back in time to other lifetimes or another life.

What was fascinating to me is when my hypnotherapist had me and Mother God go back to a previous life to see what happened, the terror welled up in me. I was completely feeling it wash through me. The phrase that hit me was, “They’re going to kill me!” I was about to be put to death for my beliefs and abilities. In that moment, I knew that I had been arrested and sentenced to death, for my clairvoyant abilities. It was the Salem Witch Trials.

I was asked to go back in time during that lifetime to see what happened. I followed my story, through being arrested, taken away in shackles, having a sham of a trial and right up to the end, where I was killed, but I couldn’t see just how I died. So, my hypnotherapist took me past my death and looked back at that life.

When you look back at a lifetime from the perspective of being in spirit, you have the bigger picture of why things played out as they did. I now had the bigger picture of why I was killed; basically, people didn’t understand clairvoyance and were afraid of it. They were led to believe that clairvoyant people were of the devil and needed to be killed so they could go back to hell. Seeing the various people who helped me be arrested, and all of the people of the court system, I found it easy to forgive them because I knew they were being ruled by fear, and I was easily able to let it all go. Then, my hypnotherapist had me walk through a screen to make sure that any energies that belonged to that lifetime did not carry over to my present life.

What was odd was that I got stuck in the screen at my right lower back/ upper hip area. Try as I might, I couldn’t pass completely through the screen. When I turned my attention to why, I suddenly saw an ax come down directly on that area of my back. In sheer horror, I realized that I had been chopped to death with an ax. I knew that it was done this way to create a slow and painful death; to feel like I was in hell before I actually got there. I also knew that there was a lot of hatred towards women in particular, from the man who was doing the killing (and perhaps from more than just him), because he very deliberately chopped up my female organs. It was horrible. Fortunately, this information popped into my head as “knowings” so I didn’t have to actually see it.

Once that scene played out, I became calm and understood the bigger picture of what went on. When asked to pass through the screen after my death, this time I passed through with no problem. Everything emotional that needed to be left with that lifetime, was.

I was asked to pass through a second, finer screen. This time I decided that I’d rather stand under a shower, so I did. As the water flowed over me, layers of soot, ash and nondescript dark and icky stuff washed off me. First my head started to gleam and sparkle. Then my shoulders, torso, and so forth, on down to my feet. I was left standing as a gold and silver being, sparkling, with light beaming out of me in every direction. My true essence was showing.

Finally, I was asked to pass through a third screen, the finest yet. I easily stepped through it, leaving behind yet more. This time leaving behind things unknowable to my human mind. On the other side of the screen, I was platinum! Light blazed out from within me. It was completely awe-some experiencing my God self. What a fantastic session.

When I go digging around to find out why something in my life that’s not comfortable or helpful, keeps popping up, I never know where it will lead me. With these subconscious programs, I don’t know where they come from or even what the true underlying emotions are. I just know that something isn’t working for me anymore. I follow the thread of what I am feeling and see where it takes me. Who knew that the feeling of becoming stuck in the mud was left over terror from having been basically murdered for my clairvoyant gift being a witch?

This is the kind of healing that I would never be able to do with talk therapy. And this, is how I fixed some of my shit the other week.



About mariner2mother

I'm a mother of a creative 20 year old son, a former merchant ship's deck officer, and a wife. To feed my creative side I take photos. I am also Reiki attuned and am a student of Energy Healing, having used several healing modalities to work on myself and my family. My most recent adventure has me navigating a very challenging Kundalini Awakening.
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7 Responses to How To Fix Your Personal Shit

  1. candidkay says:

    The walking through walls bit amazes me. How does someone get that clear, that sure? Shaolin monk, maybe? 🙂

    • I’ve taken a few Matrix Energetics workshops. It’s a consciousness technology that will blow your mind. I can’t remember, but I think the partner of Richard Bartlett, who discovered M.E., worked long and hard to pass his hand through a table. I can’t remember if he was ever successful. His book, The Physics of Miracles is fantastic.

  2. It’s definitely important to pay attention to “signs,” trends, etc… Love reading about your journey Susan!

  3. Eli Pacheco says:

    So fascinating. I’ve had experiences that have revealed glimpses of past lives, but not enough to have made sense of. How do you feel now, a little further removed from it all?

    • To tell you the truth, diving into this emotional thread stirred up some really big stuff for me. I think I’m still integrating the bits of me that seem to have gotten stuck back in time (if you will use that analogy), into the present time. Although it did shed light on why I’ve had serious issue with the institution of religion and all of the heinous acts that men have perpetrated on people (mostly women) in the name of God. That one always bugged the shit out of me in a very big way.

      It’s just recently that as I follow emotional triggers back in time, I can see when they began in my current life, and then I have been seeing a thread or threads back to previous lifetimes. It’s been really fascinating. If you’ve been able to see glimpses of past lives, with practice, you’ll be able to see more. It helps to be in a deeper meditative or hypnotic state (get the left brain quieter).

      What I love about this sort of work is how immediate and how effective it’s been for me. I’ve been able to unplug emotional triggers, effect healing from issues created decades (or lifetimes) ago, create healthy personal boundaries, bring more self love into my being, heal physical diseases, and bring more of my own self (my light) back to me that was split off during childhood trauma.

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