As a person who usually writes about my life, I was inspired by reading something another blogger wrote as she wrote about how she finds it easier to write when times are tough, than when things are going good. As if, when things are good, there’s nothing to gripe or moan about. And we all love a good gripe.
As I thought about it, I realized that I used to bitch and whine and moan and groan a lot. In fact, when I sailed on ships, it’s what most mariners I knew did extremely well. And when I wonder why, I truly have no idea. But over the past few years, I’d have to say that the way I view life has shifted quite a bit, and with a lot more peace in my heart, I don’t feel the need to complain nearly as much.
It must be because things that used to bug me and nag at me at every turn, these days just don’t. Sure, stuff gets under my skin. I get my hackles up. My fear meter jumps up. But I don’t tend to stay there for long. I guess I can move through those moments with more grace and ease and don’t get stuck in so many of them as I used to.
I think that with a perspective that sees life’s challenges as learning opportunities, instead of my sitting in a pity pot (or a place where I give my personal power away), I find ways to figure out how to grow. Yes, that’s definitely different for me these days. I got very used to playing the role of victim because I was never allowed to have personal power or self-determination when I was growing up. It was all I knew.
Sometimes, when I’m going through something, I can’t write about it until I’m out the other side and have gotten some perspective about it and have figured out just what’s happened. And even months or years later I glean even more honey.
For the past few weeks, I’ve been integrating new energies from a particularly intense healing session, and simultaneously enjoying the increased peace and freedom it’s brought. Because I’m still feeling very much “in process” with this one, I will write in more detail when I get a bit further out, with more perspective. In the meantime, I am understanding more and more about ways I wanted to grow in this lifetime, like letting go of fear of being judged and having patience. And just knowing that, I’m more at peace… at least sometimes.