I Am A Privileged White Woman

With all of the killing going on lately in the US, and abroad, I realize that I am a privileged white woman. Despite the fact that I experienced abuse by my family growing up, my heritage is from the UK and Europe, and my skin is the color of privilege in my country.

I did not grow up poor. We lived in a middle class neighborhood with single family houses on almost an acre apiece. The public school system I attended was very highly rated. And we went on vacations every summer. Playing in my neighborhood as a child, I felt generally safe.

The very few times I’ve been pulled over by police, I haven’t worried about my personal safety. When I walk around in stores that sell expensive items, I don’t feel eyes following me, or worry about being profiled as a shoplifter. I don’t worry about people being afraid of me because of the clothes I wear.

When people see me in public, I tend to be pretty much invisible because I look very generic, dressed in my mom-jeans and colored t-shirts, with my uncolored gray hair usually pulled back into a pony tail. My middle aged appearance and uncovered head does not inspire fear.

I am a privileged white woman.

Was I bullied as a kid? Yes. Have I ever been homeless? Yes. Have I experienced sexism? Sure. Have I experienced racism? Yes. But is that my every day normal? No. Is it what I focus on or expect to experience day-to-day? No.

Do I worry when I walk down the street that someone might be gunning for me? No.

I can only imagine what it’s like to be a young, non-white man living in the inner city in this country. From my few experiences of being looked down on and being dismissed because of the color of my skin and my sex, I can only imagine what it’s like to be judged solely on how I look, what I wear, or how I walk, every single day. What does it do to a person’s psyche when they are constantly judged wrongly? What does it do to a person when they are constantly living on the defense? When they are not seen as the true person that they are inside? (I ask these questions for any group who is misperceived).

With everything that’s been going on lately, what’s a person to do when the country around them is exploding in hate and divisiveness? Will it help if I feel badly for everyone who is suffering? Will it help if I get down into the muck and mire, or climb up on a cross? Will it help to focus on the hurt, pain, and death?

One thing I know for sure is that rising up in protest is NOT the answer. Rising up against anything is NOT the answer.

What will make a difference is to remember our common unity (community): our shared humanity. We all hurt and we all bleed red.  But more than anything, we each want to be seen and heard for who we are. We all want to matter. We need heart-felt connection. We need to rise up, arm in arm in solidarity and remember our humanity.

As individuals, we each want to have good lives. Those of us with families want our children to grow up to be helpful, productive members of society. At least most of us. I don’t personally know anyone who doesn’t want their children to have a life as least as good as, if not better than their own.

Obviously there are a few select groups that live to destabilize our society. They want nothing more than to see us all live in fear. Fear of death. Fear of losing our loved ones. Fearing for our safety and security. They want us to strike out at each other. They want our economy and society to be as unstable and disconnected as their hearts are.

I, for one, am not going to let that happen. At least not in my life.

From the 30,000 ft. view, I see all of this instability as a huge opportunity for people to make a decision: will you choose to live in anger and fear, or will you make decisions through your heart? This is going on throughout the entire planet. Eons of energies that have been trapped in Mother Earth are rising up, being acted out by individuals and groups, so that we have an opportunity to transmute them with love. It’s as complicated and as simple as that. As within, so without. As above, so below.

I have been doing this work on an individual level for the past few years, and now it’s the collective’s turn to follow suit.

It’s time for everyone to remember that we all spring forth from the same singular energy. It is this energy that beats each of our hearts. It’s this energy that creates miracles. It’s with this energy that we create our lives, each one a miracle. As much as we feel separate and different from each other, at our core we are unified. We are individual facets, unique expressions of the One.

In case you don’t fully understand, we are more than symbolically One. If the left side of your brain shuts down, you will be able to perceive this Oneness, where you literally won’t be able to see where you end and a wall begins. It’s only through our having a left brain that we perceive ourselves as separate from each other, when in fact, we are not.


I call this singular energy of creation, love. That word doesn’t do the feeling justice, but it’s the closest I have. I tell you about the power of love, not because it’s some fluffy, woo woo, New Age, trite, au courant thing to say, but because this is part of my truth. I have seen the energy of love in action in my own life. I know the incredible power we all hold in our hearts. Love is the one energy that can transmute hate, fear, anger, sadness, judgment, apathy, and disease. It heals like no other energy I know.

It’s time for everyone to remember the awesome power you each have.

When a tragedy happens and your heart breaks, cry. Wail. Let the sadness flow through. And when you can, get back up on your horse and ride. Open your heart again and let compassion rain down on the world. It’s critical to crank that heart open again. It’s actually designed to break and then open. Break again, and then open again. Our hearts are like parachutes: they function best when open.

A metaphysical fact to help you get through our recent tough times: people make soul agreements before they incarnate into physical bodies. They make plans with other souls. And sometimes these plans include becoming victims of murder and terrorist bombings. Other times these plans include being murders or terrorists. These are not random acts.

Something else to keep in mind is that mass media focuses only on a very tiny slice of what’s going on in the world and in our country. And the more sensational the story, the more inflammatory, divisive, and outrageous the reporting, the more attention and thus money, the media outlet will get. Do not fall for the idea that violence is random, is commonplace, and is going happen to you.

I am a not only a privileged white woman, but I’m a woman who has been on the planet for over five decades, and has experienced more than her fair share of shit raining down on her. I could very easily decide to sit in the victim chair, be a martyr, and demand that the world feel sorry for me. But I had help in remembering the extraordinary and powerful being that I am. And I ask each of you to do the same. Remember that you each hold a very special and life changing super power in your heart: LOVE.

Keep your hearts open and use them.

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About mariner2mother

I'm a mother of a very spirited 14 year old son, and a former merchant ship's deck officer. To feed my creative side I take photos and make a very occasional batch of soap. I am also Reiki attuned and am a student of Energy Healing, having used several healing modalities to work on myself and my family.
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10 Responses to I Am A Privileged White Woman

  1. janonlife says:

    That’s one powerful piece of writing, Sue. Brilliant! Using the Jill Bolte Taylor video was a masterstroke (no pun intended) too.
    I love the message you’re putting out here. Yes, that’s what the world needs to hear and those that have ears – let them listen.

    • Thanks Jan. Jill’s stroke taught me so much about the differences in our left and right brains. It helped me see just how right brained and living in the moment my son is.

  2. What an amazing piece of writing, Susan. You’ve struck a chord in my heart like you always do. I can feel your heartfelt message all the way into the middle of the country. Thank you, thank you dear friend. xo

  3. Your writing is beautiful! I love that you are acknowledging, and then transcending the painful events that are happening in the world in a way that focuses on a positive, loving outcome.

  4. Awesome words! I can relate on so many levels. Both sides need to work on forgiveness and understanding. We need calm, reasonable, open, and willing voices to breach the gap. Your piece is a great example of this.

  5. The Hook says:

    You have a true gift for speaking the truth, my friend.
    Please, don’t ever change.

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