More Storm Surge and Whitecaps

The respite between storms didn’t last as long as I’d hoped. Going through a Kundalini Awakening process has been, quite frankly, kicking my ass. It’s been the most mentally and physically challenging marathon I’ve ever experienced. I’d rather take on the Boston Marathon and Heartbreak Hill right about now. At least that would be over in a matter of hours.

Storm surge after storm surge, topped with whitecaps.

At this point, my butt is dragging so far behind me, I think it’s in another state. Or planet.

Been trying to keep the engines running, but sometimes there is no power and I have to go to all stop.

Exhaustion ends in sleep, yet sleep is not restorative. I remember my dreams and they all suck. They are all worries and fears being acted out.

I wake up almost as tired as I fell asleep.

Green seas crashing over the deck means batten down the hatches and dog the doors tight.

Some days I have no choice but to retreat to my bed, trying to remain unconscious if possible, waiting for my brain to change its wiring. Old neurology dying, firing off chemicals of fear. Sleep coming in 90 minute chunks.

Soaking in salt water helps on so many levels. The brine is magic.

Trying to do simple, everyday tasks when the brain isn’t well, doesn’t fly. So they don’t happen. Thank goodness teenagers can suddenly become very capable when they want things, like food and clean clothes.

I’m learning to strike while the iron is hot. Move when my brain and body are in sync, between the surges. And not sweat the small stuff. And believe you me, so much of what we deem imperative, really isn’t.

These days my priorities are simple. Stay alive. Keep the kid alive and the pets alive. The husband can keep himself alive, so no worries there. And the rest is gravy.

Fair winds and following seas.

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About mariner2mother

I'm a mother of a very spirited 14 year old son, and a former merchant ship's deck officer. To feed my creative side I take photos and make a very occasional batch of soap. I am also Reiki attuned and am a student of Energy Healing, having used several healing modalities to work on myself and my family.
This entry was posted in Kundalini, Mental Health, Spirituality, The Voyage and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to More Storm Surge and Whitecaps

  1. I love how you bring in the metaphor of the storm, but, of course, it makes me sad knowing that you’re weathering so much.
    That said – you embrace the battles like these and come out like sunshine from behind the clouds…or even the moon.
    Love you, Sister…you got this ❤️

    • Thanks so much Michelle. Part of the spiritual/energetic process I’m going through is that it’s very intense in general. (It produces spiritual masters and grand masters, I’m learning). Not every day or every moment is hard or intense, but often enough. That said, I have tools and support to weather the storms, and just today, with the passing of the eclipse, experienced a major “aha” moment (healing) that has brought back a bit of peace and tranquility. I think storms from the past few months were building to this point. Time will tell.

      So grateful for your love and support!!

  2. BigLizzy says:

    Sis, is some of this stuff going on with you, possibly your channeling the tension and staccato energies on the planet right now? I ask because I’ve been feeling SUPER agitated lately and even finding myself dipping into depression for the last several months. It’s been literally YEARS since I’ve felt depression’s cold hand on my throat. So, clearly something big is going on. I wonder if these words resonate with you in any way? Perhaps, some of this might be planetary as you and I appear to have a huge earth connection and we channel earth energies so readily. I’m feeling tremendous unrest. So much tension. I’m noticing so much desperation and negative emotions flinging around our culture while people learn that they are not victims and never have been despite their ideas of victimhood. Is this some of what’s reaching you, too? Tell me. In the interim, I’m sending Angels to you, lovely sister. All good things are coming. Hang in there. You’re doing great work. I love you! <3Lizzy

    • Yes. I believe so. As I was doing healing work previous to this past January, I was healing things that pertained to my life in the here and now. Then as I worked, past life issues began to come up and ask to be healed (and have been). I’m now healing things that are on a level of mass consciousness. What comes up in me are thoughts and beliefs that definitely resonate with me, and yet they resonate with everyone at some level. I love what you’re seeing, regarding people learning they’re not victims. So true. I left that mindset behind a few yeas back. And yes, big changes are afoot. And our president is doing an amazing job stirring up the muck. Lots of people are following their hearts and getting involved with their fellow man like hasn’t been done since before the Internet. People are remembering their power.

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