As a photographer, I love to play around with focus. What to focus on. Some days I love to get up close on the tiniest thing like the seed on a strawberry. While others I’m all about the landscape. Did you know the most desired portrait photos keep the subject sharply in focus while intentionally blurring out the background?
This past week, we had a few winter weather systems pass through, bringing us freezing temperatures, snow, wind, and power outages. And then we had part of a day when the sun graced us while snow stuck to everything. My favorite winter wonderland. And even though it didn’t last long, the incredible beauty called to me and I snapped a few photos.
Other than looking at life through the lens of a camera, when it comes to how I see things in general, I tend to see what’s right in front of me, as do most people.
And most of the time seeing what’s right in front of me works. And sometimes it doesn’t.
After I had my son, life taught me a huge lesson of shifting focus. He had a lot of challenging behaviors that didn’t seem to change if I raised my voice or do things like take away his toys to get him to comply with my wishes. In fact, if I did this, his behavior just got worse. I had to learn to look beneath the behavior. Before too long I learned that my son’s body and brain weren’t wired like mine. I had to figure out what helped him feel better, and when he felt better he’d do what I wanted, and was able to learn what was expected of him without melting down into a tantrum.
Everyone has something in their life that’s a chronic challenge. For some, it’s their finances, and for others, it’s relationships, perhaps a physical or mental health issue, or like me, the struggle to keep a healthy weight. Our society loves to focus on a person’s physical appearance, and a huge part of that is their weight. Doctors use a person’s weight as a marker of physical health, so if you’re overweight, people assume you’re not healthy and you lack the ability to control yourself.
I can still remember being about ten years old, having my annual physical, and my doctor telling my mother I was about five pounds overweight. From about the age of thirteen, I dieted chronically and pretty much saw myself through the lens of my weight. If I was “fit” I was acceptable and was ok with myself. If I was “fat” I was unacceptable and was definitely not ok. My weight fluctuated down and back up. Down some more and up. I was the poster child for a yo-yo dieter.
In my mid-thirties I could suddenly no longer stick to a diet. Not for even a day. And I gave up trying. As my weight increased, I finally realized I needed to shift focus. Instead of trying to control something I was obviously not able to control, I began to look inside. I began to investigate what was beneath my behavior – what was causing the cravings. Using hypnotherapy, I saw how eating saved me when I was so very little, and that cravings were still trying to save me. Food was my balm, soothing my inner child.
As I worked with a few different hypnotherapists I had success healing food cravings. Some success lasted longer than others, and when life brought me new challenges, I’d go have a few more sessions to heal new things that were finally ready to be addressed.
What I didn’t realize years ago, was how my interest in dealing with a lifelong challenge with weight by using hypnotherapy would end up introducing me to a life-altering, consciousness expanding, healing modality. By focusing on what was right in front of me – weight problems – and following breadcrumbs of what worked, I was led to my ticket to easy inner change. A way to make changes in my life from the inside out. Shifting my entire perspective of life a few times.
After having been through two different spiritual awakenings, I’m now able to shift my focus fairly easily when looking at a situation, looking through the lenses of the various participants. Able to empathize and understand different perspectives while withholding judgment and condemnation.
Standing back with a long lens, I now recognize that my soul’s desire has been working behind the scenes, guiding and leading me to a bigger picture of my life. And where it will end up I still don’t know. But I know it’s going to be good!