The parenting philosophy that I have fallen in love with is called Positive Disclipline. The website is www.positivediscipline.com , and the following is borrowed from their website.
The tools and concepts of Positive Discipline include:
- Mutual respect. Adults model firmness by respecting themselves and the needs of the situation, and kindness by respecting the needs of the child.
- Identifying the belief behind the behavior. Effective discipline recognizes the reasons kids do what they do and works to change those beliefs, rather than merely attempting to change behavior.
- Effective communication and problem solving skills.
- Discipline that teaches (and is neither permissive nor punitive).
- Focusing on solutions instead of punishment.
- Encouragement (instead of praise). Encouragement notices effort and improvement, not just success, and builds long-term self-esteem and empowerment.
Their YouTube channel Positive Discipline has many wonderful videos to assist in building parenting skills. And there are videos for teachers as well.
Another fantastic resource, is a course I took called Developing Capable Young People. It was developed by H. Stephen Glenn, and can be taken as a self study course. The course is based on the idea that when children are raised with the “Significant Seven” perceptions and skills, they become capable, self sufficient, flexible people; able to navigate the ever changing world we live in. For fans of Positive Discipline, the book Positive Discipline is one of the books for the course. I recommend the DCYP course when your child is as young as 4 or 5; and revisiting the course as your child grows and changes. I have taken the course twice, two years apart (so far).
The Significant Seven
PERCEPTIONS OF CAPABILITIES
“I am capable of facing problems and challenges and gaining strength and wisdom through experience.”
PERCEPTIONS OF SIGNIFICANCE
“My life has meaning and purpose—who I am and what I have to offer is of value in the scheme of things.”
PERCEPTIONS OF INFLUENCE
“My actions and choices influence what happens.”
The tools to respond to feelings effectively—self-assessment, self-control and self-discipline.
The tools to communicate, cooperate, negotiate, share, empathize, resolve conflicts, and listen effectively when dealing with people.
The tools of responsibility, adaptability, and flexibility necessary to deal with the environmental family, social, legal, and other systems in which we live.
The tools to set goals and/or make decisions, judgments, and choices based on moral and ethical principles, wisdom, and experience.