The other day, my son wanted to buy a particular Lego set; and he had saved up his money. When we got to the store, and that set wasn’t there, he looked around the toys and found an ultra-cool Star Wars helmet. Because this is a kid who absolutely has to spend his money when he sees toys, (and I thought the helmet was very cool), I let him buy the helmet. Even though he was more than happy with this helmet, he was very upset that he hadn’t gotten the Lego set, and also was now flat broke.
That evening, as I was putting him to bed and he was once again upset, instead of trying to solve his problem for him or providing him with suggestions, I asked him what he could do next time. His solution was to buy the toy online, so he wouldn’t be tempted by the other toys in the store. I thought it was a great idea (which of course, he’ll need my help to execute in the future- as soon as he saves his money again).
I learned from Developing Capable Young People, that rescuing a child from a situation does them a big disservice. If they are forced to come up with solutions on their own, and then pick one, this will teach them a skill that will be used throughout their life. It empowers the child.