Care and Maintenance of Your Growing Crystal Dragon

Over a year ago, I shared my wisdom of How to Raise a Crystal Dragon. With the passage of time, and moving into different times, I felt it was time for an update as Crystal Dragons grow and change at the speed of light.

http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&docid=GlMxkDIoIDM42M&tbnid=zseQAQ4wf5IuZM:&ved=0CAUQjhw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.deviantart.com%2Fmorelikethis%2Fartists%2F413604644%3Fview_mode%3D2&ei=0wYmVN27AZHxiQKwm4Eg&bvm=bv.76247554,d.cGE&psig=AFQjCNHTzU0hvNh7Tn_dpgmIvVuqQ7_y9g&ust=1411864591773829

from Kisarra at Deviantart.com

If Crystal Dragons are new to you, know that they are very special creatures, indeed. I believe I have one under my roof. As they grow and change, I’m finding one thing about these exquisite beings that remains constant, is their extreme sensitivity.

They can detect a myriad of vibrations with their scaly super antennae. Vibrations that register as feelings and emotions are received from a country mile away. Because of that, you best not lie or use deception when around them. When the sound vibrations that come out of your mouth are in dissonance to the feeling vibrations that emanate from your body, they know it and it ruffles their scales. Watch out, because they’re likely to whip their spiky tail around, and might swipe you, or worse yet, you might lose their trust.

Because of this, when you are new to a Crystal Dragon, they have to sniff you out for a while, giving you time to prove you are worthy of their trust. They do not automatically trust anyone. However, once you have gained their trust, it’s hard to lose it.

One thing you might notice when they reach a certain age, is they begin to outgrow and shed their scales. They eat a ton more, and require unusual amounts of sleep and down time. Once in a while, they’ll go through a sort of quickening, when they start shedding scales so fast that it’s physically painful. It’s tough to watch your dragon be in pain, but each quickening usually lasts only a week or two at most. During this time, it’s critical for your dragon to take a dip in the ocean, a lake, hang out in a forest, or roll in some desert sand. It will help the old scales fall off more easily.

Speaking of scales, these unique antennae also pick up radio signals from everywhere. I’m talking not just in the vicinity of where they’re standing, but across the globe and universe as well. Often the signals that are received are in language that the dragon doesn’t understand, and it can make for one confused and sometimes anxious dragon. As their teacher and mentor, it’s up to you to teach them how to install a signal filter to block out extraneous noise. It’s a multi-step process that happens over years, and you can do this.

A little bit more about their special anatomy is that their hearts are the most important organ in their bodies. You might think that the brain or stomach is more important, but for these special creatures, the health of their hearts is critical. They are made of pure 24 carat gold, and there is a thin gossamer thread that connects their heart to the hearts of everyone in the world and beyond. When their hearts are healthy, they are healthy. Their scales and eyes are shiny, their claws can remain retracted, they move effortlessly, and their golden hearts are wide open and sparkle.

When their hearts close down, they lose life force and can barely function. At worst, they shut down and die. The development of their wings can become stunted if they lose too much life force, especially during their first ten years. When Crystal Dragons are very young, their hearts are quite fragile and tend to close often. As they grow up and you mentor them, they are able to keep their hearts open and healthy for longer and longer periods of time. The state of their tails is a quick give away as to the state of their heart. When the tails are swishing around and are pointed up, they are doing well. But if you ever see their tail down and wrapped closely to their body, it might be time for some first aid.

Fortunately, first aid for a Crystal Dragon is very simple: feed it lots and lots of one thing. Love. It works like magic.

So, as your little Crystal Dragon grows, and its young wings are changing from little nubby wings into big wings, to make sure they will reach their full size and extension, be sure to keep its heart healthy. Feed it lots of love, an abundance of patience, and give it lots and lots of practice flying; so when those wings have finally gotten big and strong enough, your Crystal Dragon will know which way to head and you’ll be able to stand back and watch it soar.

Copyright Mariner2Mother

Copyright Mariner2Mother

Posted in Developing Capable Young People, Holistic Healing, Mental Health, The Voyage | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

This is Our Love Story: A Guest Post from Susan Snyder

I took a leap of faith and wrote a deeply personal love letter in the spirit of February, the month of love. The beautiful spirit, Michelle Terry, invited me to share it on her blog, Lipstick and Laundry. Thank you Michelle!

Lipstick and Laundry

My love,

This is our love story.

Loving you wasn’t easy at first. Our beginnings were fraught with denial. I majored in denial and got an A in that class. The funny thing is, the longer I denied you, the more I couldn’t. That first flutter I felt eventually turned into something that wasn’t indigestion. As my body changed, it gave you away.

You are living proof of what I tried to disavow. I tried to dismiss your existence. I didn’t want to admit that you might actually be. I tried to stop him and pretend it wasn’t happening. It most definitely happened, because you are forever real.

You entered my life with an undeniable burst of life force energy that no one could prevent. You were bound and determined to be here on this planet, at this amazing time of change, no matter what it took.

You agreed to…

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Bald Eagles!

One of my passions in life is taking photographs. And last year, around the end of January, I discovered that the area where I live celebrates a month-long Eagle Festival. Wanting to get out on a sunny day, I grabbed my son and headed up river to an eagle education site. I soon learned that even though the Eagle Festival was still very much in full swing, peak eagle-viewing time was passed, much like during our tulip time when the petals are leaving the blooms and fields are topped.

This year, noticing an uptick of eagles around our home area, I paid attention, and started venturing out in December. With winter months bringing spawning and dying salmon to our Washington State rivers, not only does this provide stock for one of our most popular catches: salmon, but it brings Bald Eagles looking for an easy meal. Eagle photo-ops abound!

Eagle on the lookout for fish.

Eagle on the lookout for fish.

About 300 feet from my front door is one of these smaller rivers. One of the beauties of living so close to eagles’ fishing ground, is being able to hear and see eagles every day; sitting in trees, flying over, circling around, and once in a while, dropping fish heads on the lawn.

These eagle photos were taken on 2 different rivers: the Samish and the Nooksack. And because photo-ops happen not just when I’m out scouting for a great picture, but when I’m out and about doing my daily business, the photos were taken with my point and shoot camera (Canon SX710 HS), that travels with me in my purse, and my digital SLR (Canon 70D).

The first group of shots was taken on the Nooksack River. I was scouting for eagles, when this bird flew towards me from a few hundred yards away, with a fish in its claws. It flew right up to where a small group of us were standing, and perched in a nearby tree to eat dinner. Click on a photo to see it in its entirety.

The next photos were caught in the spur of the moment in the front yard, and by a nearby river.

I happened upon these eagles while driving along a country road. Fortunately, I quickly found a safe place to pull over so I could capture their beauty before they flew off.

Finally, here are a few photos from a rare clear, sunny winter’s day. From November to March, the Pacific Northwest is known for its cloudy, rainy, drizzly, and foggy days, many of which include clouds down to the treetops. But once in a while, when a cold front comes through, we’ll get clear skies and freezing temperatures; which makes for some pretty photo opportunities… and freezing fingers.

No matter how many times I photograph a Bald Eagle, I never tire of how majestic they look. Now that eagle season is winding down, and it will be a few months until our tulips bloom, I’ll have to go exploring and find my next photo-op. Maybe it will a Great Blue Heron.

 

Posted in Photography | Tagged , , , , , , | 20 Comments

What If You Knew?

graphic what if you knew

What if you knew how truly amazing you really are?

 

Posted in Holistic Healing, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

Casting Off A Cloak Of Shame, Kinda Sorta By Accident

Back in early 2008 I had once again made a New Year’s commitment to lose weight (a lifelong battle), and to that end, was working with a hypnotherapist. At that point, I knew that my issues were more than what dieting could fix. During one session, something completely unexpected happened: I met and received a healing from an angel. At that time, I had not had my spiritual awakening, but had had one spiritual experience during hypnosis nine years prior when I experienced my Higher Self.

I have shared a bit of my healing process along the way with you, my dear readers, in the hopes that it might encourage someone who is struggling in life, and to open people’s minds that to the idea that we can access a variety of possibilities in life. (This is what Matrix Energetics is all about: access different possibilities). If things aren’t going the way you’d like, it is possible to bring change for the better. You do not have to follow the same road you are on if it’s one you don’t want to be on. And the really cool thing is, you don’t need to follow my path: listen through your heart and follow your own path. Just know that you can do it. I definitely recommend finding help from either a licensed therapist or a trusted intuitive. For some reason, my path made a spiritual turn, and boy am I glad it did. For me, it has made ALL the difference.

So, I’ve shared that I was raised by a bipolar mother who, when she became manic, began to see the world through skewed eyes. Her perception of everything would change and any time I would assert any semblance of my own personal power (or if she perceived that I was asserting myself), Mom would immediately become threatened and verbally attack me. Because of my extreme sensitivity, especially as a child, her words would cut me like a knife. I later learned that she was acting out a karmic script, a pattern of mother-daughter wounding that was passed down in my family from my mother and her mother and so on for several generations. Being able to heal that energetic pattern (after being verbally abused for 48 years at that point) will always be a highlight of my life.

But there are some things I haven’t really shared much at all here. I haven’t shared, and am not 100% comfortable sharing all details of other abuses I suffered. Suffice it to say, those other experiences were ones that brought me deep shame. Very deep shame. And one day, when I least expected it, an angel brought me an amazing healing that cleansed me of this shame. It helped me to cast off the cloak of shame that I had been wearing for decades.

I wrote about the experience before, when I shared How I Met My Angel, but I only briefly mentioned the part about being cleansed and purified and being reminded of the pure and innocent child of God that I am (as we all are). More than confirming by experience the existence of angels, that day healed intense shame that I had been carrying around with me for much too long. I can’t tell you what that does to a soul: to lift that burden. It was beyond intense.

Shame is a hot button for me because of having lived with it for so long, so when I see people use it to motivate or try to coerce others into certain ways of behaving (with children or in the workplace, for example), I will not stand for it. It is damaging in ways that we don’t even recognize or think of. But, in today’s society, it is sadly rampant.

That said, I want to share with you how I was able to unexpectedly cast off my cloak of shame. You can click on this link to read the original post, or just read on. I’m going to copy it in its entirety so you don’t need to link over.

How I Met My Angel

In January of 2008, I met one of my angels. Before you go writing me off as some sort of loony or psycho, we met in hypnosis. I was working with a hypnotherapist, toward the goal of weight loss (yet again), and she had me all nice and relaxed, so my conscious mind was all but asleep. We were trying to work through some old hurts, when my hypnotherapist asked me to go to my “peaceful place.” I had previously established a peaceful place, and she asked if I wanted to go there or to a new place. This is when things got interesting.

Instead of my imagining a lovely green meadow or a tranquil tropical lagoon type of setting, I immediately found myself on the snowy slope of a mountainside. I had no conscious part in this – I was just there. Everything was covered with snow, with it falling so hard that there was a white-out. All that I saw was white and pure. Then, out of nowhere, I saw a big white angel for just a moment, off to my right, and then it disappeared. A moment later, the angel was behind me, enveloping me with its wings. The wings were huge and white. I remember that it stood a bit taller than me, and I sensed that it was most definitely an “it.” Neither a woman, nor a man. I have read that angels are an entity unto themselves, and have no specific sex – although they tend to have either a male or female energy about them.

It totally surrounded me and began to heal me. As I looked down at my body, it was now translucent, like a clear plastic, and snow was swirling around inside me. The snow was cleaning and purifying me. I felt my spirit becoming clean and pure. I was reminded that I am a child of God. And because God’s creations are perfect, I am also. The feeling was more than intense, and it left me thanking God over and over again.

snowglobe

After something like this happens to me, I am always surprised at the direction the hypnosis has taken me – especially because the amazing experiences I have had, with almost no exception, have all taken me to a direction of spiritual healing.

Did I imagine this angel, or was it really there? After asking a very well-known psychic this question, he assured me that the angel was really there. Just last week, when I had the Akashic Record healing, the woman who was working with me saw an angel behind me. Apparently it was this angel that appeared to me a few years ago. And it is always with me, and has been with me throughout my various lifetimes.

So, now if someone talks about angels and wonders if they really exist, I don’t have to believe in them; because I know for sure that they are real. And I have at least one with me all the time.

Posted in Holistic Healing, Hypnosis, Mental Health, Spirituality, The Voyage | Tagged , , , , , , | 16 Comments

Bringing Sunshine Into My Life

sunshine blogger awardAs we close out 2015, I am honored to have been nominated to receive the Sunshine Blogger award by my blogging friend, Jan Stone.

Thank you Jan! I have to share that because of connecting to Jan via our blogs, a country and ocean away (I live in the Pacific Northwest, US, and she in England), I met up with a fellow blogger a mere hour from my home. And at that blogger’s house, we Skyped with Jan, so I was able to say hello, live and in person!

 

Inspired by Jan’s sharing a song, when I think of Sunshine, this is the song that pops into my head:

 

Now the rules for sunshine blogger award: 

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you for the award.
  • Display the banner /sticker /logo on your blog.
  • Share 7 facts or things about yourself.
  • Nominate 5 bloggers that you admire and inform nominees by commenting on their blog.

Here are a few things about me, in case you didn’t already know:

  1. I’m a former merchant ship’s deck officer (navigator) and small boat captain. (Hence my user name of mariner2mother).
  2. These days, my primary job is mother to Little Man, whom I write about from time to time. He’s been one of my biggest teachers, and is now officially taller than me, so I’d better come up with another nickname for him.
  3. Our home is in the lush green Pacific Northwest of the United States. The reason it’s so green around here is it’s literally a rain forest. Yes! Not all rain forests are steamy and hot. In fact, I live in one of the cloudiest and wettest areas of the country.
  4. My first and foremost hobby/ passion is taking photographs, mostly of nature. There is so much beauty around where I live that opportunities abound. My home is at the foot of the Cascade Mountains and is about a 35 minute drive to Puget Sound, the nearest ocean. Rivers and lakes abound, with a small stream and a tiny river transecting my yard.
  5. After having woken up spiritually almost six years ago, I’ve had quite a ride discovering how I connect to spirit, how I receive intuition, and learning to trust it all.
  6. My biggest passion these days (next to taking pictures) is identifying and healing things in my life that aren’t working for me. I’ve learned that a huge amount of our behavior is driven by subconscious programming that is usually developed when we are very young. And chronic diseases we develop can often be attributed to beliefs we carry. Using a variety of energy healing methods, we can dissolve programming that is doing us harm, and I have.
  7. One of the things I haven’t blogged about is my love for music. I am the daughter of a professional musician and I studied the violin starting at age 8. I played through high school and half way through college, performing concerts, participating in orchestras, and more. But when my career headed to sea, my violin was kept safely at home. Even though I don’t play my violin much these days, I am constantly playing music in my home and car, and most definitely sing along.

Now the tough part, nominating only five bloggers that I admire.

I’ll begin with the first blogger I connected with, Darla, who writes She’s a Maineiac. Her dry, witty sense of humor from Maine (a former home that I dearly miss) drew me in immediately.

Next, a blogger who is geographically closest to me is Dawn Quyle Landau, who writes Tales From The Motherland, Straight Up With a Twist, Dawn’s writing skills leave me green with envy, and have garnered her a well deserved place as a regular contributor to the Huffington Post.

The third blog I want to share is The Sisterwives because it shares raw and honest, unashamed, uncensored, and unafraid stories from a conglomeration of very talented women writers.

The fourth blog is one of a handful of blogs I try to never miss. And if I do miss a few posts, I’ll usually binge-read to get caught up. Lipstick and Laundry, Celebrating Imperfection One Pile at a Time is the creation of Michelle Terry, showcasing her talents in writing and photography.

And finally, another blogger I very much admire is Kristine Rodriguez of Candidkay , who beautifully shares her journey through life’s ups and downs.

Now that I’ve fulfilled the requirements of receiving this wonderful award, I’d like to share three blogs that bring more than sunshine into my life, they bring light and truth directly from source.

John Smallman channels Jesus in his regular posts in Jesus Through John. The messages are always of and from love. And with the audio available, I often press play and just listen.

Bob and Cynthia co-create the blog Ask the Council. Cynthia brings through the eternal wisdom of The Council, while Bob poses questions sent in by readers of their life struggles and queries. These days, session recordings are posted so you can hear them in action.

Taryn Crimi writes Angelic Guides, sharing angelic wisdom on a variety of topics that include the journey of the soul through life and death, the telepathic language of the heart, and a new breed of humans: what to expect from the children incarnating now. I am particularly fascinated by their take on the new breed of humans because I believe Little Man is one.

I sincerely thank everyone who frequents my blog and especially those who have cared to comment along the way of my journey. You all make the ride a richer one. Here’s to a peaceful 2016.

Posted in Random, Spirituality, The Voyage | Tagged , | 19 Comments

Spills and Messes Happen

This morning, Little Man decided to make himself a cup of mac and cheese. He’s done this many times before, so it wasn’t a new thing. I heard him peel the plastic wrap off the top of the cup, pull out the little packet of powdered cheese, and fill the pasta-filled cup with water, right up to the line.

cup of mac and cheese

Then he put the cup in the over-the-cooktop microwave where it whirled around and around for about 3 minutes. As he was pulling the hot cup out of the microwave, I heard was him exclaiming something like “Ouch!” and then I heard running (my guess was cool) water in the kitchen sink. Apparently, something went wrong and he got some of the cup’s hot contents on his hand. After asking a few pointed questions about what happened, I finally got up off my butt and cast my eyes towards the cooktop.

There they were: Darth Vader, R2D2, Yoda, and C3PO, in a soup of starchy water all over my cooktop and counters, with the back wall looking like some nouveau art piece. There was no rescuing this meal.

I had a few choices; two of which were punishment or discipline*. I could get all pissed off at my son’s carelessness that left him burned and the food wasted, and banish him from the kitchen forever, or I could chalk it up to one of those things that happen and turn it into a teaching moment in the hopes that it might not happen again in the near future. These days, I try to not get too out of whack over things like this, but rather take steps to minimize the likelihood of its reoccurrence. I guess I’m a teacher at heart. Besides, I don’t like getting mad.

Little Man started trying to pick up R2D2 and Darth Vader one by one, as they slipped from between his fingers. Seeing that this could become an all morning affair, I showed him how a spatula could double as a shovel. He grabbed some paper towels to sop up the water. I showed him that the knobs come completely off the cooktop, making it vastly easier to get at C3PO, who was hiding beneath a few of them.

He also grabbed the sponge to sop up more water. After squeezing starchy water out of the sponge, I told him about the importance of rinsing whatever you’re mopping up, out of the sponge – which evolved into a conversation about how mixing water and flour makes paste, and with that paste and strips of newspaper and a balloon, you can make a piñata. Thank goodness he didn’t want to launch into making a piñata, as would so often happen when he was younger.

As he was sopping up water, I took the newly rinsed sponge and wiped the back wall and the underneath side of the microwave. I made sure Little Man went around the edges of the cooktop with a paper towel to soak up any water that tried to seep in that crack. Pretty soon I was telling him to be sure to give everything a final wipe down with a clean sponge, as I stepped back and noticed the bit that made it all the way to the floor. Little Man was surprised at how far the starchy water had travelled when his cup fell, hitting the cooktop with a serious amount of force.

I just realized that I missed an opportunity to tell him about action/reaction and turning potential energy into kinetic energy. It’s ok. He hasn’t gotten to physics yet, and by then I’m sure he’ll spill something else.

As Little Man got another cup of mac and cheese to cook, I reminded him that if he puts a plate underneath the cup, he’s not as likely to get burned when he pulls it, hot and steaming, out of the microwave.

After successfully cooking a new bowl of mac and cheese, the bonus for him was being able to have 2 packets of powdered cheese in this second bowl since the first packet was never used. The bonus for me was ending up with a clean cooktop and counters.

The awesome thing about handling messes like this by keeping my cool and not freaking out, is when Little Man does this sort of thing again (and he will), instead of panicking about making Mom mad, or getting worried because he’s screwed up and been bad, his thoughts will go to the place of knowing that he can clean up his mess and try again.

Life is full of messes, spills and mistakes. Teaching Little Man how to capably and confidently handle what comes up is a huge part of my being his Mom.

*I am referring to discipline from the Latin disciplina, which refers to teaching or instruction. Not the middle English definition which refers to mortification by scourging oneself, whose connotation of hurting one who has done wrong, has become the common usage here in the U.S.

Posted in Developing Capable Young People, Positive Discipline, The Voyage | Tagged , , , , , | 5 Comments

Christmas Eve’s Lesson

I’ll never forget the day, Christmas Eve 2012. That morning, I was ready for Christmas, with presents purchased and many not yet wrapped. I had just returned from a morning run to town for groceries and had the minivan pulled into the garage, rear hatch door up. My cell phone rang. It was Mom.

I answered the call and her daytime caregiver was on the line. Ever since Mom had been released from a mental hospital several weeks prior, she required a caregiver at home. Initially, it was 24 hours a day, but lately as she was doing better, Pet was with Mom twelve hours a day, seven days a week.

“Susan!” she blurted out with her Caribbean lilt. “It’s your mother! I think she might be dead! I don’t know.” I slumped onto the rear opening of the van, head down, tears coming quickly. “She’s been having trouble sleeping, so I let her sleep in. When it was lunch time and I still didn’t see her, I went up to check on her. Oh God. I think she’s gone.”

“You think?!” She had already called 911 and EMT’s were upstairs checking on Mom. About this time, one of the men came back downstairs to confirm the horribly unexpected. Mom was dead.

Then Pet started mumbling something about a note. “What?! A note?” Holy shit. Reality slapped me across the face harder than Mom’s words had ever cut me. All her pill bottles were empty. The rest of the conversation was awkward and short. I’d call her back soon.

The next few days were a blur of notifying family, making it through Christmas and booking a cross-country flight. One sibling lived out of the country at the time and couldn’t zip back to the states on a moment’s notice. My other, older sibling didn’t seem to understand why it was so important to get on a plane and personally get himself to Mom’s house. Because, you dumb fuck, when your last parent dies, you get your ass to her house and deal with her body, her cats, the house, and a variety of other things. The caregiver’s job just ended. It’s not her job to go through any paperwork. And she has no authority to deal with the funeral home. Why the hell you didn’t get it was beyond me.

So on Christmas Eve I booked a flight for the day after Christmas to fly home and deal with Mom. Just ten months after Dad left us.

This ended 10 months of “dealing with Mom.” Days of monitoring her mental status (from across country): watching it deteriorate. Days of worried phone calls between caregiver and me, and me and Mom’s doctor, psychopharmacologist (they prescribe psych drugs), and therapist. Days of calling Mom, seemingly out of the blue – after her caregiver called me telling me Mom was talking about driving somewhere – asking her to not get behind the wheel of a car, because she didn’t know she wasn’t safe to drive (and taking her anger). Getting Mom hospitalized when she stopped taking her meds and lost all sense of reality: when her delusions and paranoia were what was real to her. Watching her faculties begin to fail, as she repeatedly called me, asking how to get into her email (when she’d been using it for the past few years with no incident). And getting her hospitalized again, several months later, when she was too depressed to get out of bed for anything but eating 2 bites, using the bathroom, and going back to bed for weeks on end. This all fell on my shoulders.

It’s been almost three years since this very dramatic and draining time, and a lot has happened. Mom’s life was celebrated, the house was emptied and sold a few months later, and with her gone, it was like a green light for me that now I could get busy on a lot of healing. Healing years of our relationship, many of which I didn’t remember. Do you know what it’s like to think back to the first 10 or so years of your life and have only a few spotty memories? The younger I go, the less I remember.

As I’ve worked with intuitives and hypnotherapists, I’ve been able to “see” and shift a butt-ton of old crap. It’s been amazingly fast progress. What I particularly love about tackling old emotional hurts using the framework of energy and energy work is, the unknown is made known, and in that process, is easily and forever changed for the better. And having the spiritual perspective gives my brain the candy it needs to find peace.

The most recent session I did with my hypnotherapist addressed a period of several recent weeks in November where I was not feeling well, emotionally, at all. And intuitive guidance from a friend suggested that a shoulder injury I was dealing with had to do with old energies of my mother’s mental illness that I had taken on. (We take on thoughts and beliefs from other people, thinking these energies are actually part of ourselves. And these energies can literally lodge in our physical body, contributing to areas of weakness or pain).

Just before the session, I wanted to know what was going on with feeling so depressed and crappy lately. The session was a little bit difficult in the beginning, but once I was able to get going, it became clear that what I really wanted was to be able to let go of all my anger toward my mother once and for all. I was tired of carrying that heavy load for so many decades; being a victim of my mother’s razor-sharp tongue for all but the last 8 months of our shared lives.

As we went along, there was a part of me that wanted to know why I agreed in a pre-birth agreement to have a mother who was mentally ill, who would verbally abuse me, and another family member who treated me very badly as we grew up. Why would I take that crap on? What the hell was I thinking when I was crafting the possibilities of this life? (Yes, we make agreements with other souls to play the parts of parents, siblings, teachers, friends, in this play we call life, before we are born into each life). When the answer dropped into my head, the truth of it was crystal clear and left me so emotionally relieved that I bawled. They did it for me. Experiencing this realization in the hypnotic state allowed every cell in my body to completely absorb the message and release any old anger. So, so powerful.

They took on roles that to our human eyes, made them look like barbarians, for my benefit. So I could have the most amazing experience of moving from thinking I was a poor, downtrodden victim, to rising up and into my own exquisite, divine brilliance. This is what life is about. It took their sharp and exceedingly hard tools to cut and polish my being into the diamond it’s becoming.

After all, if you’re going to facet a diamond, if you want to do it quickly, you’re going to need something extremely strong and hard to cut it. My mother’s sharp tongue was the perfect tool to create the strength of pain that I needed to move me this fast, this far.

My message for this much celebrated time of year, is for everyone who has experienced hard times, bad times, or sad times, to know that life is not random. Bad shit doesn’t happen TO US, life is FOR US. The most painful situations in our lives are created to give us an opportunity to change how we react to them, from feeling powerless and victimized, becoming afraid, angry, or fearful, to gradually moving into our power by first feeling a bit of understanding, then neutrality, and eventually moving into compassion and gratitude (for the challenge).

Now is the time for everyone to step into their divine brilliance of sparkling light and know the compassionate, loving being that is their birthright (that we’ve only temporarily forgotten).

Posted in Energy Therapy, Holistic Healing, Hypnosis, Mental Health, Spirituality, The Voyage | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

50 Happy Things for 2015: Bloggers Unite in Flood of Gratitude

Dawn Landau of Tales From The Motherland challenged a bunch of us bloggers to sit down, and with a timer set for 10 minutes, write 50 things we’re happy about and grateful for. Tis the season to open our hearts. And if you’d care to join in, I’d love you to help us spread the wave of good vibes.

a mariner2mother photograph

a mariner2mother photograph

 

Timer is set, and here I go! Here’s what I’m happy about and grateful for:

1. My wonderful husband, without whom I’d be very lonely and would probably still be out at sea somewhere.

2. My  son, who has been my greatest teacher.

3. My home, that is cozy, is my safe place, and is really quite “me.”

4. My health, which is pretty darn good (especially when my back is happy).

5. My friends, who are there for me, and who are fun to hang with.

6. My most amazing hypnotherapist.

7. My mattress. I absolutely LOVE my mattress.

8. My favorite 8″ slicer kitchen knife. One of the best tools around.

9. My car. My minivan is the most perfect Mom-mobile. Lots of room to carry people and stuff, and all wheel drive so I don’t get stuck in snow. Last summer I got 3 people and 3 kayaks in/ on my car.

10. Where I live. I love where I live. We are surrounded by woods and a small river and a tiny stream. This time of year we are visited by eagles, all the time.

11. My new camera. My #1 passion is photography, and I just picked up a new point and shoot camera that totally rocks! A Canon SX710hs.

12. My new kitchen counter. Love, love, love my beautiful granite counter!

13. Newly refinished oak in my kitchen. Bringing old, worn cabinetry back to life by refinishing it brings back the wood’s amazing beauty.

14. My pocketbook. I just love my bag! It’s a neutral color that goes with every and anything, and is big enough to hold all my junk.

15. A Christmas wreath hanging on the wall. Some dear friends back in TN made a beautiful wreath out of sticks and twigs, wrapped in ribbon, and decorated with lights and a few ornaments.

16. My son’s teachers at present. We finally got things dialed in at school so Little Man has a fighting chance at being successful. It’s been too long.

17. Our wood stove. I love wood heat!

18. My electric hot water kettle. Best kitchen appliance ever!

19. As for experiences, I’m thankful for being able to take an Awakening the Intuitive Heart workshop late last winter.

20. Grateful for being able to road trip to California last spring break, and seeing Mount Shasta.

21. Thankful for being able to see family on the east coast last summer.

As you can see, I’m not the quickest at posts like this and didn’t come close to 50 things. But I thank you all for reading and for those who want to play along, cheers! In truth, I am grateful for everything I have and everything I am.
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If you’d like to join in, here’s how it works: set a timer for 10 minutes; timing this is critical. Once you start the timer, start your list. The goal is to write 50 things that made you happy in 2015, or 50 things that you feel grateful for. The idea is to not think too hard; write what comes to mind in the time allotted. When the timer’s done, stop writing. If you haven’t written 50 things, that’s ok. If you have more than 50 things and still have time, keep writing; you can’t feel too happy or too grateful! When you finish your list, you can take a few extra minutes to add links and photos.

To join the bloggers who have come together for this project: 1) Write your post and publish it (please copy and paste the instructions from this post, into yours). 2) Click on the blue frog at the bottom of Dawn’s post. 3) That will take you to another window, where  you can paste the URL to your post. 4) Follow the prompts, and your post will be added to the Blog Party List.

Please note that only blog posts that include a list of 50 (or an attempt to write 50) things that made you feel Happy or 50 things that you are Grateful for, will be included. Please only add links to posts that are part of this exercise.

Posted in The Voyage | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

When A Child Blames Themselves For Abuse

It’s a common thing. In fact, it’s an epidemic. When children are abused, they often blame themselves. It doesn’t make sense at first glance, but then again, it makes perfect sense.

As a child who suffered abuse, I have spent time during my adult years dealing with the repercussions and even healing from it. Something I didn’t learn until fairly recently is why children take responsibility when something bad happens to them, when something bad is done to them.

As an adult, looking through eyes with life experience and wisdom, I know that when someone does something to hurt a child, whether it’s hitting them, repeatedly yelling at them, cutting them down, or molesting them, there is nothing a child could possibly do to ever deserve such treatment.

As a kid, being mistreated didn’t make sense to me at first, and when things don’t make sense, the brain freaks out in fear. My body would go into fight or flight mode, with cortisol and adrenaline pumping all out. In these moments, when I felt completely powerless, one way that my brain felt better was to take responsibility. That was how it made sense of things. Something bad happened to me, I must have deserved it. These thoughts actually made me feel better. Makes perfect sense to a child.

I didn’t even have to be threatened to not tell anyone. It started when I was so young that it became my normal from the beginning. Anytime something bad happened to me, I knew I played a part in being deserving of it, and when I got older, spilling the beans about anything would make me get in trouble (I felt). It was my fault. It was my fault that I was treated badly.

abused child

Image Courtesy: http://psytreasure.com/

If a child is hit, they must have done something to deserve it. If they are verbally decimated, they obviously did something wrong and are bad. If they are molested, it’s their fault. It is logical to the brain, and makes it feel better. Keep in mind that the brain is linear and logical and needs certain things to make sense of the world. When these parameters are met, it relaxes out of fight or flight mode.

During my journey of healing, I’ve been able to travel back in time, using hypnotherapy, to see over and over again, how I took on responsibility for behaviors perpetrated by others during my young life. The awesome thing about revisiting these moments using hypnotherapy, is connecting with that bit of me that seems to be stuck in time, still believing that she is to blame for bad things that happened to her.

I can make the connection with that younger version of me and share my adult wisdom with her, letting her see that she was absolutely not to blame in any part whatsoever. In that moment, the younger me realizes that she did nothing wrong. She’s not bad. She’s a beautiful little child who had some crazy-ass people doing crazy-ass things to her. She is instantly able to let go of all the blame and shame, and take back her personal power. That’s all it takes to shift and release these old beliefs. Like magic! A miracle!

So, you ask, so what? Well, when you carry these pesky old beliefs around with you, they affect you in ways you can never tell. They contribute to your not feeling so fabulous about yourself. When they are pinged on by something happening to you, you act out (without consciously knowing why) in a myriad of ways. Trust me, I’ve been there and done that.

You might road rage, or become triggered when you see someone being treated unfairly, or become triggered when something happens to you making you feel powerless in some way. The thing is, you become triggered and react. A very common reaction to these feelings coming up is trying to make them go away by doing things that make you feel good in the moment, things that boost endorphins. Lash out in anger, drink something, eat something, drive fast, buy something, have sex. The common denominator that screams “unhealed belief acting up!” is, the quick fix doesn’t really fix what’s going on because it keeps popping up.

Another way of dealing with unhealed beliefs that trigger us and pop up unexpectedly is control. When a part of us feels amazingly out of control, we do all sorts of odd things that don’t even relate to what originally made us feel so powerless and out of control.

Over years of medicating these types of beliefs with short-term band aids that don’t really fix things (ironically referred to as a “fix”), it’s not uncommon for the reactions to evolve into depression and self-loathing. Depression is old anger and sadness turned inward and not processed. And extremely controlling behavior is OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder).

These beliefs of self-blame stay with you your entire life, acting up and acting out at times, and you don’t know why. They will stay active until they are dealt with. I can guaran-damn-tee it. In the healing world, the term is transmuted. They are transformed so that they don’t negatively affect you ever again.

Thankfully, there are a variety of ways to transmute feelings of self-blame. The Energy Healing arts is all about transmutation. Therapists do great things with talk therapy. And things like prayer and meditation can work wonders as well. What matters is connecting with that (often unconscious) little one that still exists inside of you that is still feeling blame and letting them know they are perfect, innocent, and an amazing child of God, who was doing what they had to do at the time to survive.

Posted in Energy Therapy, Holistic Healing, Hypnosis, Spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , | 28 Comments